A Little Nostalgic

Nostalgia: (noun)
1. A wistful desire to return in thought or in fact to a former time in one's life, to one's home or homeland, or to one's family and friends; a sentimental yearning for the happiness of a former place or time
2. A bittersweet longing for things, persons, or situations of the past.

I visited my college campus today. It was a sort of nostalgic experience, well, a very nostalgic experience. I drove by the campus in March when my Mom was visiting, but haven't walked through the campus in over a year. There have been so, so many changes. The field where I used to watch very exciting soccer games and more laid back baseball games is no longer in place. The library has relocated to a brand new building, where that soccer/baseball field used to be. Other offices/buildings have relocated. Married student housing homes, where friends of mine lived are either moved off their foundations, windows boarded up and sort of suspended midair are clustered in one corner of the campus, or those still on their foundations are all blocked off with doors ajar and looking very rundown. The Holman Apartments, my abode during my Senior year have been renamed the Coates Apartments.

I parked my car near the new Concordia Place Apartments. I thought it was so strange to have a residence area on the complete opposite side of campus. We'd always talked about how the residential area was on one side of campus and the scholastic area was on the other side. The sides mingle now. I made my way to the center of campus and started my self-guided tour at the brand new George R. White Library and Learning Center. This was a 'monsterous' building for this campus. I remember thinking that when I saw the framework in March. Even though it is big, it is now campus "hot spot" I can tell. There were actually groups of students working/studying together. There were study rooms. There was learning going on. Not that this hadn't happened in the old library, it had just happened differently because of the layout and size of the library. This was exciting. There is Cafe 1905 (the year Concordia was founded) that is run by Sisters Coffee Company...a company run by the family of two Concordia Alums that I went to school with. There are three floors of books, periodicals, classrooms, faculty offices, study rooms, etc. I strolled each floor. Somewhere in the depths of the library is a thesis I wrote. I never did find it. Truthfully, I wasn't looking that hard for it...just a thought that something I wrote is somewhere within those walls. The lights are censored. They turn on when you walk under them...at first I thought I was seeing things, then I realized that only when I walked under the lights would they turn on. Nice feature. After scoping out all the floors and peaking in windows, etc. I made my way back out into the sun. I wanted to go to part of the campus that was old and familiar.

I headed for Luther Hall...the main building on campus. I felt like I was a student again going in the back door and all. Checked out my old stomping grounds in the Admission Department. I spent so many hours there. Walked by offices of my former profs, all of which had changed and moved. It is amazing how much has changed, but also how much has stayed the same. I walked out and through Hagen Center, which has always housed the dining hall and used to house the library. Pretty much the same. Out again, and over to the old "residential area." Even walked on a path that Marc, the maintenance and groundskeeper when I was a student, had put in. I stopped and looked at a campus map and was shocked to see they'd renamed Holman, like I said earlier. How weird. They have also moved the bookstore and ELS classroom south of the campus about 4 blocks. Again, how weird.

I stopped and saw the windows of the rooms I had lived in during my years as a student. Remembered my first day on campus, meeting friends that I still have and events that happened in those places. I was amazed when I thought of how we had all changed in these past eight years. My brother reminded me the other night that I have now officially been out of college longer than I was in college. Where has the time gone? What have I done? Even though it seems like forever ago, it also sometimes seems like just yesterday.

I don't recall having been this sentimental about my college years before. I was today. I don't know if it is because I have finally moved past the "I'm so ready to not write papers and study all the time" mindset, or if it is because I truly loved the time (which I did-when I wasn't studying). College is one of those times (very few times, if not the only time) where you are in-between in life. Not quite an adult living in the 'real world', no longer a kid living at home. Don't get me wrong. Even though I enjoyed my college years, it wasn't the classroom hours, papers, books, etc that I miss. It is the friendship, commradery, knowing that there are people all around you sharing in your goal: graduating with more knowledge than you entered with. It is the people I miss, walking out your door and passing friends who live a matter of feet from you. Staying awake late into the night for an "all nighter" before the big test.

My body was all sorts of screwed up during college. Going to bed at 3, 4, 5 am. Rolling out of bed for a 9am class (where most are still in their pajamas) and then back to your room for a nap until your next class. There was one span of time I'd go to bed, or rather, take a nap between 6 and 7 am after working on my thesis all night. I'd get up, go to work, go to practicum site, go to class, go to work, go work on thesis until all hours and then back to the nap. Why'd we do that to ourselves? How'd we live through it? I really would die now if I attempted to make my body follow that schedule. Anywho, lots of memories-mainly of the people, the experiences, the times both fun and challenging.

These pictures are partly for my Mom and Dads benefit as they are the ones who spent the most time on campus while I was there and would appreciate the pictures in helping to establish landmarks.

Above: The building on the left is the gym (where the graduation ceremony was held). I was standing about where home plate would be if it was still the baseball field. The building on the right is the library/learning center (where outfield would be).

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Below: The new George R White Library and Learning Center. Pretty much an amazing building. The thing I really liked was the amount of natural light that comes in...with all those windows it will be a nice place to be during gloomy Portland days when all the light you can get is good and welcome.

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Above: The back of Hagen Campus Center where the dining hall is. I as standing about where Left Field would be, next to the Theatre Building.

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Below: DAD--this is where the Hospitality House that you stayed in was at. Crazy, huh?! Now standing in its place are the new Concordia Place Apartments. I was standing between the gym and the theatre.

New Concordia Place Apartments

The trip up to NE was enlightening for me. I am glad for the growth and change that the campus has gone through, but also now know how the alums who visited during the 100 year anniversary felt when they saw all the changes the school has gone through between 1905, when it opened as a boys school, through the time it became a co-ed school to a college and then to university by 2005. Here's to more change and growth in Concordia's future!